The Sociopath’s Delusion of Attractiveness. It’s His Primal Need to Subjugate and Horny Delusion.

Of course sociopaths and narcissists want to be around “attractive” people and intimate partners; and of course, all of us want to believe we are attractive.

BUT…sociopaths and narcissists are so out-of-control with their addiction to receiving CONSTANT validation and attention that when a prospective new target stimulates them by providing them with approval, they will Fantasy Idealize the target as “Gorgeous-Like Perfection,” and this “Gorgeous-Like Perfection” is – and will ever be – smitten by his “Great, Manly Godliness.”

Love and Longing in Art: Orpheus and Eurydice
Love and Longing in Art: Orpheus and Eurydice

In essence, he is fantasizing her into being the fantasy he has about himself.

This is why he is obsessed with nudity and porn and social-media images of his sexual preference: he is deluding himself that her “perfection” matches his “perfection” and they will soon meet and she will fall forever in love with him. Hence, this “perfect, sexual goddess” will choose him ABOVE all others and in addition, she will be his maid, mother, cook, and care-taker as well.

Sociopaths and narcissists want Mother Goddess and Sexual Diva all wrapped up in one.

The sociopath is purely animalistic and operates on a primitive level: Sex, Food, Attention, Gratification, Materialism, Shelter.

However, the sociopath lives in a delusion and of course no one is perfection, and in fact, most people don’t look that great naked and without their hair products and makeup; and pornography and naked images and social media are pure illusion: inauthentic personality via words and claims; body and full face makeup; hair-extensions; cosmetic surgery; special lighting, and editing.

The Sociopath Delusion of meeting his Perfect Goddess is built up during the Honeymoon Phase of Infatuation and Lust. She is falling for his Charm and Perfection and in turn, she is acting with great Charm and Perfection. He is horny; she is horny. To take this further: both male and female are in a state of Horny Delusion.
However, the difference lies in the fact that the non-disordered person does not lie, slander, smear, cheat and destroy when the Horny Delusion fades away. The non-disordered person can transmute feelings of infatuation and gratification-seeking into compassion, loyalty, protection and steadfastness; whereas, a sociopath or narcissist will never be true, steadfast or loyal.

When the Horny Delusion fades away, the sociopath will grow bored and realize that he is not with Perfection, Mother Goddess and Sexual Diva. The Horny Delusion fades away when real life happens: she calls him out on something; she demands truth, loyalty and consistency; she expects him to ACT like a REAL man.

This is when he will start seeing our “faults” and “imperfections.” Well, to him, these are “faults” and “imperfections;” but, in fact, we are human.

Sociopaths don’t want a real human being: they want a Fantasy Doll that blinks – in slow motion – her big, fake, plastic eyelids at him, and all the while, saying nothing…well, except for complimenting him.

When the lustful, honeymoon period is over and he has conquered us and we start expecting REAL…he will see our “imperfection”…and then he will grow angry, bitter, and hostile and viciously turn on us because his fantasy delusion of “His Perfection and Our Perfection makes for a Great Match” is shattered…
When his horny infatuation for us dies away, he starts emerging into reality, which is boredom or death to him, and hence, he starts seeing the truth and drudgery of everyday life and people, and through seeing our “faults,” he becomes aware of his own infallibility and lack of perfection.

After we have been conquered and his lust and horniness fades away, he despises us because he sees himself and he despises himself. He only stops hating himself when he is chasing, idealizing, and conquering a new target.

He does not have REAL goals: his life focus is to gain the admiration and control of an Idealized Target. Through this, he believes he is “worthy.” In essence, he is gaining the approval of his mother because all sociopaths/narcissists have mother issues.

Sociopaths live in a Delusion and they don’t do Reality.

Though he is far from a great specimen of Adonis, he believes he is perfection, inside and out, and he believes he is deserving of The Perfect Woman…to MATCH who he is. And he only sees “perfection” when he is horny or idealizing and when he is being idealized in return.

This explains why you will see two extremes in regards to the sociopath’s list of past and current Idealized Targets:

1. The sociopath’s less than Ideal looking (or achieving) target while all along the sociopath is proclaiming that he only “gets the best and most beautiful women.”
Or:
2. An old or fat or bald or short or gross sociopath/narcissist saying, when in ANOTHER new relationship, and with a glow in his eyes: “We make a perfect match” with regard to someone of a far better quality than himself…

When in fact, normal people don’t categorize their exes, current partner, or sexual preferences at all…especially to another target.  

The sociopath is shallow, superficial, & delusional & only Fantasy Idealizes us when he BECOMES OBSESSED WITH CONTROLLING & CONQUERING US, HAVING SEX WITH US, AND GETTING US TO BE HIS MOTHER CARE-TAKER.

Lynna, Author of “My Sociopath – An Empath’s Soul Journey Among Sociopaths.”
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Author: My Sociopath

Oceanside, California

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