The “Me vs. Her” mentality.
“No matter how thin the pancake, there are always two sides.” My mother taught me this when I was 6-years old and when MS told me that the neighbors hated his ex-wife, I thought, “oh, she must be awful,” and when he told me that the neighbors hated his ex-girlfriend (the one he left the wife and child for), I thought, “oh, she must be awful.”
Upon sight of me, my 80-year old neighbor lady did a quick head snap (you know, like a nasty 12-year old girl in the school lunch room toward the sweet, geeky, unpopular 12-year old girl) in the opposite direction of my hello-wave.
“How odd I thought, I’ve only ever been nice to her.” Still trying to be a “pure of thought” person (spite the train-wreck of my life at the hands of a sociopath), I thought: “Oh she must have gotten something in her eye.”
I found out a short-time later that MS is going into the homes of my 75-85 year old neighbors (he is an electronic/home repair man) and crying crocodile tears that he is “homeless,” I “kicked him out of his home,” and I’m an “awful person.”
MS has 4-other homes (1-home he just Loan Modified under false Income Statements), a business that I grew strong (after me, he ruined it because he sits all day on Facebook or gossiping), 3 vehicles that were preserved our entire marriage (he ran mine into the ground instead), and savings in the country of Turkey. Family Court gave me possession of this tiny, little home and plus, I proved that it was my before-marriage resources that paid for it.
People wake up…Two-sides to every story! Women want to believe the crazy stuff these sick guys tell us about other women because it makes us feel: “Oh, I’m NOT like that, I’m better than ‘her,” I’m special and he will love me so much because I’m different than HER!” Instead, think to yourself: “Hmmmm…if I sat down with “her,” I wonder what she would have to say about him?”
If he was divorced: Go read his divorce file at the courthouse. Pull the actual file and READ IT! It doesn’t cost anything.