One thing I’ve learned from being “Stuck by A Sociopath” and my full blow dive into researching this creepy disorder is this: Just like all of us, Sociopaths are unique. Though the popular checklists of Sociopath traits are great resources, I feel compelled to compile my own checklist, if not for my own sanity but for others who need to see many versions of the Sociopath condition manifest itself. I put a * when using an already established term.
1. Always “The Victim”: A Sociopath is always the “victim” of something that goes wrong and especially in relationships. They were always the “great” one in the relationship and the other person was always somehow “crazy,” “bad” or “neglectful.”
2. Difficulty Living Alone: Sociopaths usually live with a stronger and more capable person that handles most of the responsibility (financial and other). This could be a person that makes more money, has health insurance (will want to marry), and does majority of household business matters (dealing with day-to-day running, cooking, cleaning, child/pet care etc…)
a. Sociopaths will make it seem the opposite: They are doing most of the household work and making a bigger financial contribution.
b. This trait will diminish as a Sociopath gets older. Older Sociopaths have fewer people to choose from that can be manipulated into a living situation.
3. Careless: Sociopaths do things quickly thus breaking and losing things.
a. Sociopaths do not care for your personal property but will be obsessed over their own personal property being taken care of and maintained.
4. Reckless with life: Sociopaths drive dangerously and put pets into harmful situations (e.g., leaving gates open for dogs to get out of, leaving cats out at night, not checking for available water).
5. Smear Campaign:* A Sociopath will always be smearing someone and inciting people against each other.
a. Sociopaths do not want people to like or get along with each other and will try to “divide and conquer.” They will say odd things to people in the social group: “She doesn’t like you” or “She doesn’t want me doing anything with you.”
6. Jealous: Sociopaths are extremely jealous and insecure people. Everything is a threat to them.
a. Don’t ever tell a Sociopath about your PAST. However benign the story is, they will obsess over it and then turn it around and use it against you when you become a Target*.
b. A Sociopath will feel threatened by a pet, child, close friend or a supporting family member. They do NOT want you to have anyone in your life! (Please be careful with your pets: A Sociopath can KILL your pet(s) and easily get away with it).
7. User: Everyone serves some kind of purpose, no matter how great or small, for a Sociopath.
a. A Sociopath has a strange network of Support People ranging from “consultants,” to skilled-workers, to enabling co-dependents that back him up when he wants to go after his Target*.
b. Most of the Support People have their own Psychological problems.
8. Drama Queen: There is always conflict going on in a Sociopath’s life and it involves a “bad person,” “bad business” or “bad transaction.”
a. A Sociopath is always “pitting” people against each other.
9. Can’t do Anything Alone: A Sociopath has a hard time being alone and will desperately hunt people out for stimulation.
a. A Sociopath will seek strangers out on the internet for “companionship” and will “cry” about his great need for “love” and extreme “loneliness.”
10. Appears hardworking. helpful and generous: The Sociopath has many people working behind the scenes much harder and his help and generosity comes with the expectation that he will receive more in return.
11. Double Standards: Everything is a double standard for a Sociopath.
a. A Sociopath will expect that you keep isolated and “only onto him,” and be completely dedicated and loyal to him. Yet, he will be constantly slandering you and violating your honor and reputation.
b. A Sociopath will expect complete faithfulness from you, but will be cheating with any woman that pays him any attention.